Every year, Blue Monday – the so-called “most depressing day of the year” – rolls around, bringing with it a wave of messaging that reinforces a sense of struggle, exhaustion, and defeat. It’s easy to get caught up in these collective narratives, absorbing the beliefs and perspectives of those around us, whether from media, society, or the people we interact with daily.
But here’s the truth: You have the power to change your story.
You are not obligated to adopt the beliefs that make you feel drained, discouraged, or stuck. You get to choose differently. In fact, if the stories you’re telling yourself aren’t serving you, I’d go so far as to say you need to choose differently.
The Stories We Tell Ourselves Shape Our Reality
Life shouldn’t feel hard all the time. Your energy levels shouldn’t be constantly depleted. If you’re feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, or disconnected from the life you truly want, then it’s time to shift the beliefs that are keeping you in this cycle.
Consider the stories you tell yourself every day:
- “I can’t prioritise sleep because there’s too much to do.” → This belief keeps you stuck in exhaustion.
- “Eating well is too complicated and time-consuming.” → This belief keeps you stuck in unhealthy habits.
- “I’m just not motivated to exercise.” → This belief keeps you from moving your body in ways that energise you.
Your beliefs shape your actions, and your actions shape your reality. If you tell yourself something is difficult, it will be. But if you start to believe something can be easy, effortless, or at least possible, that will also be true.
You’ve Already Done This Before
Think about something you once found hard but now do with ease. Driving a car is a perfect example. When you were first learning, it felt overwhelming – so many things to coordinate, so many opportunities for mistakes. At some point, you may have thought, “This is too hard, I’ll never get the hang of it.”
But you kept going. You practiced. You focused on the why – the freedom, independence, and convenience that driving would bring to your life. Eventually, it became second nature.
The same principle applies to any belief or habit. You have the power to change your narrative, just as you did with driving (or any other skill you’ve mastered over time). The key is choosing to focus on the positive outcome rather than the initial discomfort of change.
The Importance of a Strong ‘Why’
When you want to change a habit, the early days can be challenging. Your brain resists change because it craves efficiency – it prefers the well-worn neural pathways that keep things familiar, even if they’re not serving you.
This is why your why is so important.
Just like learning to drive, making lasting change requires a compelling reason. Without a strong why, it’s easy to slip back into old habits. But when your reason for change is deeply meaningful – whether it’s having more energy to run around with your kids, feeling vibrant in your body, or reclaiming a sense of calm – it fuels you through the tougher moments that will inevitably happen when you are changing things in your life.
So, ask yourself:
- Why do I want to create this change?
- What will my life look and feel like when I shift this belief or habit?
- Who do I become when I follow through? And what will that enable me to do?
The Power of Support and Accountability
Let’s be honest – change isn’t always easy. There will be moments when it feels hard, when old patterns try to pull you back in. This is where support and accountability become invaluable.
Having someone in your corner – whether a coach, mentor, or trusted friend – can make all the difference. Someone to remind you of your why when you lose sight of it. Someone to hold you accountable when you feel tempted to slip back into familiar habits. Someone to celebrate your wins, even when you don’t see them yourself.
The right support system helps bridge the gap between where you are now and where you want to be. It reinforces your belief that lasting change is possible, that you are capable of creating the life you desire.
Belief Before Action
Here’s the bottom line: If you don’t believe lasting change is possible, it won’t be.
This is why, in my work with clients, we don’t start with habit changes – we start with belief shifts. Because without a deep-rooted belief in your ability to sustain change, even the most well-intentioned efforts will be temporary.
Yes, you can make changes for a short while, powered by motivation and willpower. But if, deep down, you still believe change isn’t truly possible for you, you’ll eventually revert to old patterns. And when that happens, it reinforces the belief that lasting transformation is out of reach.
Real, sustainable change happens when you rewrite the stories that have been holding you back. When you shift your identity and fully embody the version of yourself who lives the life you desire – not just temporarily, but as a new way of being.
Your Challenge: Rewrite Your Story
So, let me ask you:
- What’s one belief that’s been keeping you stuck?
- How can you begin to reframe it?
- And, with that awareness, what’s one action you can take today to step into your new story?
Remember, you get to choose differently. You are not bound by old narratives. The life you want is not out of reach – you just need to believe that it’s possible.
If this resonated with you, I’d love to hear from you (my contact details are below). And if you’re ready to shift your beliefs and patterns so you can start living the life you truly desire (and deserve) let’s explore how I can support you on that journey – send me an email to start that conversation.
If this blog has resonated with you, you might also what to read these ones:
- Why I stopped setting resolutions and I think you should too
- The ONE question you need to ask yourself to start creating the life you truly desire
- Why sitting at your desk every day isn’t cutting it (and how to shift your energy)
- You need to listen to this BEFORE you dive headlong into your business goals
And if you prefer to listen to this in audio form, you can find my podcast on this exact topic on Spotify here and on Apple Podcasts here.